Holly Fairfield

Disappointment shows us who we really are, what we actually believe, and in whom we put our trust. All three things can be either intricately woven or a hot mess of a knot. My first honest experience with disappointment showed me that I was one of those with a tangled knot of weak-kneed faith plus a lousy understanding of my Heavenly Father. I cried my way through that dark valley and ignored the chance to get real with God. Muddling through life doesn’t build any firm foundation, so when another round of dashed expectations came, my perspective on life was still just a tangled mess. But the disappointment softened my heart this time and turned my thoughts to God’s Word. I learned then that the Bible answers every question and God’s Spirit is the Guide to lead me through. Isaiah 40:11 says, “He will tend his flock like a shepherd; he will gather the lambs in his arms; he will carry them in his bosom, and gently lead those that are with young.” It has been a slow process over many years; as I have studied His Word, I have untangled my knot of confused theology. In its place, the Spirit has woven a strong foundation: I am His dearly loved child, He is my King and Messiah, and I am resting in His sovereignty. Psalm 27:8 says, “You have said, ‘Seek my face.’ My heart says to you, ‘Your face, Lord, do I seek.’”

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